Power Rangers Swag
if you ever think a fandom is bad
just remember
Let me tell you… how much of a freakin’ hassle it was to play a damn video game with my sister last night. Michelle, if you’re reading this, please don’t beat me up later.
It was about midnight when my sister asked me what I was doing. I said “nothing”. So she asked if I wanted to do something with her. And I said yes.
SO HERE’S THE FIRST PROBLEM.
The only console we avidly play with is the Play Station 3. But, that was in the living room, which was being occupied at the time. I tried to ask the occupants to leave, but no luck. And I didn’t want to remove the PS3 and its orgy of cables and move it to my sister’s room because:
1. Too much work.
2. Didn’t want to disturb the lovely occupants who refused to move their arses.
But we were determined to play something.
SO HERE’S THE SECOND PROBLEM.
We didn’t know what game to play. While trifling through our PS3 games, I realized they all sucked and they were boring. My impudent sister agreed and went back to her Godforsaken Facebook and phone. So with the occupied living room and lack of good games, there was only one solution… Play with the Wii. Rather, use the Wii to play Gamecube games because our Wii games also suck and… well, that ties into our third problem.
SO HERE’S THE THIRD DAMN PROBLEM.
We plugged everything in, it was working and we were ready to play when… We had no Wii remotes. Without the remote we can’t point and click at the screen to start the game. My lovely, inane sister said she could have left them at a friends’ house. At this point, not only did I want to strangle her, but it was 1AM. We spent nearly an hour scrambling around, plugging stuff in, taking stuff out, finding things, not finding things, and being very very frustrated. But we weren’t going to give up so easily. If we couldn’t play Gamecube games on the Wii, we would use our actual Gamecube. Yes, we have an actual Gamecube! You’re probably wondering, “Why didn’t they just use the Gamecube in the first place?” Well first of all, shut your whore mouth. We used the Wii out of convenience, but that proved to be very inconvenient…
SO HERE’S THE FOURTH PROBLEM.
Now we have to find the Gamecube. In my sister’s room, there’s a huge blue storage box that we thought the infernal gaming console might be in. We opened it with glee only to find useless sewing materials that my sister would never ever use again after her “sewing phase”. After searching every room in the house, we finally deducted that it was in the garage.
SO HERE’S THE FIFTH PROBLEM.
In our garage, there’s a large storage shelf that hangs from the ceiling. Boxes of old junk sit on that elevated surface only to collect dust. But one particular box had all of our old gaming stuff, which included the Gamecube. But of course, it’s horribly high, and our access to our desired box was denied by a heavy box of useless Beanie-Babies that were sitting on top of it.
SO HERE’S THE SIXTH PROBLEM.
My sister, who assumes she is stronger just because she is older, climbs on a small ladder and tries to move boxes around. She comments on the weight of the boxes being very heavy. Plus, she’s at an awkward height where she has to strain her arms to even reach anything. So we switch to a bigger ladder and try again. I must remind you, this is all in the middle of the night and we are trying very hard to remain quiet and not disturb anyone.
SO HERE’S THE SEVENTH PROBLEM.
My sister’s car was in the way of the ladder. The ladder could barely fit in between my sister’s car and a stupid filing cabinet. The only solution was to move her car. So we move the extremely heavy/high ladder off to the side while my dearest sister moves her Satan-mobile to the driveway. Finally, we are able to use the ladder and reach the Gamecube.
SO HERE’S THE EIGHTH PROBLEM.
After rearranging everything and finally gaining access to the box with the Gamecube, my sister says it’s too heavy to simply lift and bring down to the floor. And breaking news: My college-bound sister sees what else is in the box and wants practically everything inside it to bring with her. (NES, SNES, controllers, games… I hate you.) So she hands everything down to me, one by one, and I struggle to find places to put them. Once that’s all finished, we put everything back the way it was (minus the game stuffs) and try to make the garage appear like it’s never been touched by two stupid girls who JUST WANT TO PLAY SOME DAMN VIDEO GAMES.
SO HERE’S THE NINTH PROBLEM.
We forgot how the ladders were originally arranged in the garage. If we didn’t put them back exactly the way they were before, we’d be caught the next morning. Parents have very keen eyes when it comes to their children messing with things they shouldn’t be messing with. So we argued and shifted the ladders around a billion times before we thought it was adequately placed. And with that, we had to make two trips from the garage to my sister’s room to get everything settled…
SO HERE’S THE TENTH PROBLEM.
2AM. Floor assaulted with various consoles, games, controllers, and cords. We plugged in the Gamecube’s main power cord thing. Then we plug in the composite video cables (those 3 little yellow, white, and red plugs). We FINALLY got the Gamecube and were eager to play the remainder of the night away when…
THERE WAS NO SOUND AND NO COLOR.
SO HERE’S THE ELEVENTH PROBLEM.
I was like a slap to the face. We didn’t know what the heck was going on or why the Gamecube was being such an asshole to us. My sister had to scour google for an answer, and did not find any. Now since you’ve been so good and managed to sympathize with us this far, I’ll keep it short. We were using composite cables for the PS3 and we didn’t know. Luckily the Gamecube can use the composite cables from the Nintendo 64. So we used those and thank the Lord, the Gamecube finally had full color and sound.
BUT IT’S NOT OVER YET. HERE’S THE TWELFTH PROBLEM.
We couldn’t find our memory card. I searched through every disk holder, hoping it would be in one of those. It wasn’t. We had no choice but to use our memory card that was specifically for Animal Crossing.
SO HERE’S THE THIRTEENTH PROBLEM. (don’t worry, last one.)
There was no room on the memory card. The game we were trying to play used 26 blocks of storage. The Animal Crossing memory card could only hold 59 blocks, and 58 were already being used.
….
At this point we didn’t even care, and just played without saving. By the time this whole ordeal was over, it was 3 in the morning. We played for about two hours before we got tired and fell asleep…
And that my dear followers, was the story of my sister and I trying to play some video games last night. It took us 3 hours to sit down and play something.
THREE.
HOURS.
Was it worth it? …Eh. And I hope this kind of BS happens to you someday, so that you can understand our pathetic pain.
Btw, we DID get caught the next morning. And we were trying to play X-men Legends II: Rise of Apocalypse.
tl;dr? Fuck you.
(via advisery)
Senior Yearbook Survey:
5. Do you have any hobbies?
I collect the souls of the innocent.
7. Do you have any special talents?
I can do a voice impression of Lumpy Space Princess from Adventure Time.
8. Do you have any friends who have awesome hidden talents?
I have absolutely no friends. :)
11. Do you have any nicknames? What are they and how did you get them?
I’m Batman. Robin really gets on my nerves sometimes.
12. Some ridiculous question asking about some event that has changed my life.
An event in my life that I consider defining was when I started watching My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. That show taught me the true meaning of friendship and it is the greatest cartoon on planet Earth. Applejack is best pony.
13. What do you plan on doing after high school?
I plan on becoming a Jedi, then maybe joining the Dark Side. If I’m bored.
In ten words or less fewer, define who you are
Snape killed Dumbledore.
……
ALSO: I put a bunch of stickers on the paper.
I finally got sick and tired of him yelling at me all the time. I knocked his ass out and sent him swimming with the fishes.
Thor Movie - God of Mischief
Avengers Movie - God of Sexual Frustration for fangirls
